Sparkling white.........

So there i was in the shower this morning, relaxing under the warmth of the water flowing down over me, when a string of thoughts took over.

I have been using bicarb soda to clean the bathroom, as an alternative to chemical gunk, and i spied the box on top of the bathroom cabinet.

Then i started to admire what a great job it does keeping the bathroom clean which of course led me to thinking about how it can also be used as a tooth whitener. Such a useful product.

Of course, this led me to thinking about how you might be able to use it for anal bleaching. What if everytime you took a shower, you dabbed a little on and washed it off just before you got out?

Well, it all makes perfect sense doesn't it?

So of course, in the name of science, i fully intend to run the experiment. My evil friend, the Rooster, suggests that if i experiment on myself i must include photos. Before and after.

Wrong.com

No Logophile - no matter how perverted they are, deserves that - so i am putting out the call for volunteers - if you'd like to bleach natures exit hole in a non-aggressive, gentle way, let me know. I'll even throw in a few boxes of bicarb as an incentive!

I will need photos, but i know many of you would be completely ok bearing your ring, so give it up.

x mp

A pull through with a pine cone.....

I awoke this morning feeling reinvigorated after spitting out felching yesterday. It felt like i had had a mental pull through with a pine cone. So where did that leave me? After a silent meditation sitting at the reception desk it led me to the topic of anal bleaching. I'm not sure why but here goes.

Anal Bleaching

A cosmetic technique where strong bleaching solutions like hydroquinones are used to lighten the anal or vaginal area. This procedure is often employed by strippers, body builders, porns stars, actors and actresses. It has also become increasingly popular in the suburbs. There are suggestions that with the increase of brazilian waxing methods, people started to take more notice of these areas as they were clearly more visible and this has caused the increase of interest in bleaching.

Seems over time, the "butticular" area becomes darker (some say it's due to dark foods like coffee, others speculate it's due to staining from the bilirubin content in feces.) Either way, those who aspire to wear butt floss as swimwear, perform in porn movies, pander to their partners strange desires or pole dance seem to feel a lighter sphincter will improve their image. The treatment is said to sting quite a bit.

e.g. "Canula made her third appointment for anal bleaching. Despite her husband Fafner's assurance that he found her hindquarters pleasing enough as they were, Canula felt that the skin around her inner buttocks could use a good bleaching. The treatment stung a lot, frankly, it was worse than that case of diaper rash she remembered from that unfortunate time..well, not to dwell on past failures. When she healed up a week later, Canula donned her best thong and did a fine striptease for Fafner on their bedroom pole.

Fafner agreed, her lightened sphincter was really a lot sexier and it even glowed in the dark. This last observation puzzled Canula."

(Adapted from urbandictionary.com)

If your appetite has been wetted by this morsel of information i have included a tasty review for you to take in: britesmile for bungholes and even a delightful little bleaching video so you can have the full buffet.

May the anal albinos live long and shine forever!